What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

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Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why do people say "tall, dark, and handsome" when they actually mean "tall, white, and handsome"?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Have you ever had sex with your mother-in-law? If so, how was it and did your wife ever find out?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Why after 50 years of being straight do I constantly desire to suck cock?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

What is the dirtiest thing you have witnessed your wife do?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Are there any guys, crossdressers, or transgender girls here who wear tampons?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Has anyone ever really waited that long and gotten a paper check mailed 20 days ago?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Elon Musk posts throwback to SpaceX’s garage days after the 500th Falcon rocket launch; his caption reads - Times of India

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

What’s the best way to get over someone you love?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Why do programmers choose to write their own code instead of using code that is already available online?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Why are Democrats at Q so desperate that they keep taking down my links to comments that prove the residents in Ohio have been filing complaints about the Haitians eating the local wildlife from ponds in the local parks? Election interference

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Is it because Trump is impulsive that he is never on time?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...